The Most Disturbing Pants on TV

These belong to Fiona Bruce. Her pristine white slacks remind me of a tampon advert with huskies and roller blades. Every week I tune in to check whether they’ve been slartered with the shite of a thousand lorry drivers. Imagine if she had to stop off at that transport café on the A1 on the way to the sticks to present Antweeks Roadshow. She’s so brave. One episode even started with her on top of an Anglo Saxon church with a flag pole behind her flying the cross of St George. No doubt some pervy producer thought it would be fun to run Fiona’s white pants up the flagpole complete with…er … but not with the pope in town.

My favourite red dwarf Gliese 581 made the news this morning because someone realized there’s a possibility of life on one of its satellites, G. I have to warn you all before you rush over that the Gliesens next door on F are absolute unreasonable bastards. Gliese 581 F (discovered in 09) featured in a sci-fi story I wrote. If they keep finding these Gliese 581s, I’ll keep writing about them. However, it’s a long time before we can nip over to Gliese 581 G for a cup of sugar because it’s 20 light years away. No problems in sci-fi terms though. We can go there right now in sci-fi land. Speaking of which my sci-fi story How I came To Light Up the Universe is going to appear in Weirdyear this Sunday 3rd October.

I just completed a survey on blogging sent by Technorati and it reminded me to update my Technorati profile. What a surprise. The web site that used to know about everything is now in the kind of mess that overcomes a company once it grows large and corporate. McAfee, Powweb, Myspace, Facebook and so on. It won’t save changes to my updated profile. I wasted ages changing the bio, but no. Then I started hunting to see if they know about my blog I claimed four years ago. Nothing. It’s all gone. So I went over to the support blog only to find teams of paid bloggers who rely on Technorati for their income going ape. My problems are insignificant to the scale of the disaster, and this is the web site that allowed us to check Lily Allen’s record company’s claim that she made it through Myspace when in fact her Myspace page was added after she was famous. Maybe the corporate wolves are at the door waiting to shut it down for knowing too much.